Fear of flying: a step-by-step exposure ladder
If boarding an airplane fills you with dread, you need not start with a long flight. Below is an example ladder of fourteen steps, from a takeoff video to a short flight alone. It is a starting point, not a tested program: reword the steps and replace the fear numbers with your own. Pick the first step that feels uncomfortable but doable, and repeat it until you have tested what you fear and it feels manageable enough to repeat safely.
Flying
Easiest first. The suggested steps, their order, times and distances, and the fear numbers are illustrative examples, not a tested program. Rate each step yourself from 0 (no fear) to 100 (the most afraid you can imagine), change the wording to fit your life, and add your own steps.
Watch a 10-minute video of a smooth commercial jet takeoff and climb from a passenger window view.
Start here — uncomfortable but doable
Watch a pilot explain common flight sensations, wing flex, and turbulence on video.
Visit a local airport viewing area or terminal observation deck and watch ten aircraft take off and land.
Walk inside an airport terminal, spend 30 minutes observing the ticketing hall, security, and boarding gates.
Book a short 45-to-60-minute domestic flight for yourself and a calm, trusted travel partner.
On the day of the flight, check in and go through security to the gate with your companion.
Board the aircraft, find your seat, buckle your seatbelt, and let your shoulders drop during pushback.
Keep your hands resting lightly in your lap rather than clutching the armrests during takeoff and initial climb.
Stay seated through cruise and mild bumps without checking flight-tracking or weather apps.
Stay seated through cruise and mild bumps without scanning the crew for signs of trouble.
Take the return flight sitting apart from your companion.
Take a short 45-to-60-minute flight on your own.
Take a 1-to-2-hour flight on your own.
Take a 1-to-2-hour flight on your own without your lucky object or pre-boarding ritual.
Keep your ladder
Stay safe while you practice
- If you feel chest pain, pain spreading to your arm or jaw, or you faint, stop and call 911.
- Don't practice after alcohol, cannabis, or medication that makes you drowsy.
- If your fear goes above 80 and stays there, stop safely, breathe out slowly, and pick a lower step next time. Stopping is not failing.
- If a panic attack starts, get somewhere safe first (if you are driving, stop the car), then use the free Panic Reset.
- Keep taking any medication as prescribed. Talk to your prescriber before changing anything.
- Always follow the cabin crew and the seat belt sign, during practice flights as on any other flight.
- If you have a health condition that could be affected by flying, check with your doctor before booking.
- Do not use alcohol to get through a practice flight. If you take medicine, keep taking it as prescribed and talk to your prescriber before changing anything.
A self-help tool. Not a medical device or a substitute for professional care.
Why flying triggers panic
Air travel brings several anxiety triggers together at once. Once the cabin doors close and the aircraft pushes back from the gate, you cannot get off until you arrive. For a nervous system that is scanning for danger, being unable to leave easily can feel like being trapped.
A cabin is also full of sensations that everyday life on the ground does not prepare you for: vibration, banking turns, pressure changes in your ears during the climb and descent, and changes in engine sound. When you are already anxious, it is easy to read these ordinary events as signs that something is going wrong.
Avoidance keeps the fear going. Each cancelled trip brings relief, but it also means you never get to learn that you can feel anxious on a plane and still arrive. A ladder lets you collect that evidence in steps small enough to take.
What you might be predicting
Before an exposure, it helps to name what you expect to happen. Here are some predictions you might recognize:
- •“The plane will hit turbulence and fall out of the sky”
- •“Something will go wrong with the engines in mid-air”
- •“I will have a panic attack at 30,000 feet and lose control”
- •“I will not be able to breathe in the cabin”
- •“I will embarrass myself by crying or asking to get off”
- •“Nobody on board will know how to help me if I feel unwell”
Safety behaviors to drop, one at a time
Safety behaviors give quick relief, but they convince the brain that you only survived because of the crutch. As you move up your ladder, aim to drop them gradually. Only drop what anxiety adds; anything that genuinely keeps you or others safe stays:
- 1Checking turbulence forecasts and weather radar over and over before the trip
- 2Carrying lucky objects or repeating rituals before boarding
- 3Gripping the armrests for the whole flight and watching the cabin crew for signs of trouble
- 4Needing a travel companion to talk to you or hold your arm during every turn
- 5Listening to every change in engine sound and every chime, expecting the worst
- 6Refusing to stand up or use the lavatory because moving around feels unsafe
Tips for this situation
- The FAA describes turbulence as normal and common, but notes it can throw passengers who are not wearing their seat belts from their seats without warning. Keep your belt fastened whenever you are seated, and follow the seat belt sign and the crew.
- Notice where you are bracing: hands, jaw, shoulders. Let one of them loosen at a time. Holding yourself rigid keeps your attention on the threat.
- If panic rises, breathe slowly and deeply, as the NHS suggests. Treat it as something steady to do while the sensations rise and fall, not as something you must get right for the step to count.
- On your first flights it is fine to bring an audio story or music. On later flights, leave it off for part of the climb so you learn you can manage without it.
- Resist the urge to track altitude and airspeed on your phone throughout the trip. Constant checking is a safety behavior that keeps your attention glued to perceived danger.
When to get professional care
Self-help ladders are helpful for manageable avoidance, but some situations call for professional evaluation and support:
- •Fear of flying stops you from work you need to do, seeing family, or attending important events.
- •Dread starts weeks before a trip and disturbs your sleep, appetite, or work.
- •Panic attacks happen often, including away from planes, or you are starting to avoid other places too.
- •Your fear began after a frightening flight and comes with nightmares or flashbacks. A therapist who works with trauma can help, and this ladder is not the right place to start.
Frequently asked questions
Is turbulence dangerous?
The FAA says turbulence is normal and happens often, but that it can be dangerous: the bumpy ride can throw passengers who are not wearing their seat belts from their seats without warning. Its advice to passengers is to keep the seat belt buckled at all times while seated, and to listen to the pilots and flight attendants.
What if I feel faint during takeoff or landing?
The NHS lists feeling faint and dizziness among the symptoms of a panic attack, and notes that most panic attacks last between 5 and 20 minutes. Feeling faint is not the same as actually fainting. Stay seated, keep your belt fastened, and breathe slowly and deeply. If you have ever actually fainted or lost awareness, talk to your doctor before practicing.
Can I ask the cabin crew for help?
Yes. You can press the call button or speak to a crew member when they pass and tell them you are feeling very anxious. If you also feel physically unwell, tell them that too.
Do I need a fear-of-flying course before a real flight?
No. The videos, airport visits and short flights on this ladder follow the principle NHS inform describes for simple phobias: gradually becoming exposed to what causes your fear. NHS inform also notes that no single programme works for everyone, and that some people choose to get help from a specialist such as a psychologist.
- •Turbulence: Staying Safe (Federal Aviation Administration (FAA))
- •Phobias (NHS inform)
- •Panic disorder (NHS)
- •Maximizing exposure therapy: An inhibitory learning approach (Craske et al., 2014) (Behaviour Research and Therapy)
A self-help tool. Not a medical device or a substitute for professional care.
Take your ladder with you
We're building a companion mobile app that keeps your ladder and practice log on your phone, so you can record each practice once you're done.
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